Energetic Cords

We are made of energy. Every single part of you can be reduced down to particles, which all in turn vibrate at a certain frequency that allows you to be present in this current dimension (among others). It isn’t unreasonable, then, to think that we may be affected by the frequencies around us as well. We’re constantly riding through energy streams every moment of every day while experiencing and interacting with the energy of others. Therefore, I feel that it’s really important to become conscious of the energies both within you and around you.

Energy cannot be created nor destroyed, per the first law of thermodynamics. Even when you think it’s been gone or destroyed, it’s simply moved somewhere else, or taken a different form that you don’t recognize.

This sentiment clearly has more than a few potential implications.

As humans with physical forms, there are limits to what we are capable of sensing and experiencing. Our physicality tends to get in the way. We vibrate very slowly and heavily in order to exist here on this Earth in this dimension. It is difficult to move into dimensions with higher, finer frequencies when you’re stuck in a very dense carrying case. Just because we cannot perceive it doesn’t mean it isn’t there – quite the contrary.

When we hide a ball underneath a cup, we can no longer see it. Does that mean it has ceased to exist?

Quantum physics has come to the same conclusion – particles still exist even when not observed. The force of gravity has never been seen with eyes. But it’ll sure remind you that it exists. It’s one of the signature intangible forces of this Earth that reminds us that the confirmation of human sight is not a requirement for existence. It’s cute how we believe that our experience IS the experience, no ifs, ands, or buts.

When we energetically entangle with others, in either a positive or negative sense, these connections can remain active, like a program running in your subconscious background. Still there even when not observed. No matter how much time, space, or distance there is in between. No matter if the energy is existing in a physical body or if it is halfway across the Universe, dancing on the rings of a distant planet. The connection is still there as long as you allow it to be. We strengthen our cords by getting closer to people – platonically, intimately, romantically. When I tell people to be careful who they decide to share a bed with, it is less about the 3D concerns. Sexual union creates a powerful connection – one that is very difficult to sever.

Energetic connections from past lives can still be active in this life, because regardless of the body, you are still the same energy inside. And whether those from your past lives are here again in another carrying case or whether they are energetic beings in another dimension, they can (and often will) still find you to reconnect. They remember. You do, too, down in your energetic depths. You just may need help remembering – to be given the keys to unlock the memories.

This goes for connections in our current lives, too. When you go through a breakup, or when a friendship dissolves, there are things we do to break the connection. We unfriend them on Facebook. We unfollow them on Instagram. We delete their numbers from our phones. We put up a barrier to keep them out of our lives. But these are such 3D ways of disconnecting. The Universe does not operate in the 3D. It’s beyond that.

You wonder why you can’t get them out of your head. You wonder why every single person who you strike up a conversation with decides to mention their name. They still feel so close, even when you think you’ve done everything to push them as far away as possible. You have not yet addressed the energetic cord between you.

Not all cords are created equal. Some of them truly feed us and bring us effortless joy, love, and laughter. And as most of us know, some of them deplete and drain us of all we have. Being aware of your cords and managing them as necessary is a great energetic service to yourself.

When some people feel a cord is complete and wish to end a relationship, you will often hear of cord-cutting ceremonies or procedures. There’s a big divide over this in the field of spirituality. Some teachers are very anti-cutting and feel that you will receive some sort of karmic smack for it. Other teachers promote cutting cords as an integral way of keeping yourself safe and protected from others. As usual, I fall in the middle of the road. I have done things both ways and have never been ‘punished’ by the Universe for it, but I also believe it’s due to the way I choose to manage cords, which I will detail.

If you do not feel that it is necessary to cut the cord entirely, you can open a circle or sacred space and narrow the cord so that neither of you feels as much of an energetic ‘hit’ from each other. You can imagine thinning the cord with your hands or a knife until you feel that it is at an acceptable width. It would be wise to call on deities you have a connection with, guides, or ancestors to protect you and guide you as you complete this task.

In my lifetime, I have only ever cut cords with three people. I did a lot of reading about it beforehand because my intuition knew that it sounded like a pretty serious thing. After reading everything I could, I came up with my own method of cutting cords. The three people I cut cords with are still in my life. It didn’t get rid of them. It gave me an opportunity to form a new cord with them, one without whatever negativity and expectations that the first one had. Of course, you could also choose to keep the severance.

When you cut a cord, everything changes. You will not be able to form the original cord again because you would need to have everything take place again exactly as it had before. Which…you know, kind of impossible. To me, this is what the consequence is, not being able to go back, but I do recognize that I am someone who does a lot of introspective and shadow work. If I really can’t figure out another way to shift things without cutting the cord, then for me, it’s the final solution.

However, for a majority of people, there’s a lesson within that subpar relationship that they aren’t learning. Maybe the other person is mirroring something that they need to be working on. In these situations, cutting the cord will get rid of that person…but someone else is going to come along in the production of your life, their understudy, if you will, and teach you the same lesson again.

You will need to learn the lesson. The Universe will give it to you again. But you do have a say in how it happens. The easiest way to avoid learning the lesson negatively? If there is a lesson within this relationship that I need to learn, I cut this cord and request a new teacher who will help me learn the lesson with ease and grace.

Taking Inventory of Your Cords

More often than not, you’ll know it when a cord needs to be managed. You’ll be experiencing a lot of negative or intrusive thoughts, sensations, or feelings like I mentioned above, even when you have tried to disconnect (albeit in the 3D ways.) There are some instances though where I have felt called to go in and take a general assessment – periods where I notice that I have been more tired and uninspired than usual – and would like to know where or to whom my energy is going.

Here are a few prompts to get you thinking, shared with love from one of my teachers, Dr. Athena Perrakis (Sage Goddess):

Who do you share outdated cords with today, and what have you done to try and break the connection?


When you think of consciously deciding NOT to take on other people’s energies anymore, and rather give them back to those people with love, what feelings come up for you? Where do you find resistance when you contemplate on doing only your work and not the work of others?


Where in your life do you need to hold tighter and more sacred boundaries so that you are able to hold space without being seen as the space itself?


Cord Narrowing & Cutting Procedure

1. Rinse off. In the energetic sense. Before entering into ritual of any kind, I make it a point to make sure I am coming in clean and free to be able to focus on the work I need to do, cleansing both myself and the space in which I am doing the work.

2. Set up your sacred ritual space. At its most basic, a sacred space is a clean, quiet, protected space in which you have privacy to do energetic work.

You can go the extra mile(s) as you see fit: maybe you light a candle, burn incense, call in your guardians or directions. Whatever makes you feel protected and whatever brings the space into the frequency you’re looking for.

3. State your intentions for the work you’re about to do. You can do this a few ways. You can either go into a meditation and communicate your intentions to the Universe that way or you can simply speak aloud. If you need an example, I generally greet all of my guides and protectors that I have called in and inform them of what’s going on. “In this sacred, protected space, I am here to (narrow/cut) any connections that are not serving me in the highest way.”

4. Come face to face with the people, places, memories, or situations that you are narrowing or cutting your connection to. In your meditation or visualization, see and feel into who or what or where you are releasing. For me it tends to be people, so I will visualize them sitting there in front of me. I say what I need to say. Why I’m about to do what I’m going to do. How it began. How it’s ending. My own mistakes in handling any situations between us.

5. Ask your body where the cord is located. Be still and silent. Your body will show you, either through a sensation, a feeling, or it will flash you an image in your mind. Trust what you receive as answer. Don’t question it. The only way to build up your intuition is to trust what it tells you. Everyone has intuitive ability – be one of the ones who works and practices opening it.

6. Narrow or cut the cord. In your visualization, hold the cord in your hands. Examine it – what it looks like, how thick it is, how long it is. Feel into your intuition – does it need to be cut, or can it be narrowed? Remember the permanence of cutting.

Before cutting or narrowing the cord, be sure to say this: “If there is an important lesson that I needed to learn within this connection, I receive a new teacher for this lesson who will teach me with ease and grace.”

If you are narrowing the cord, either imagine or use a ceremonial knife to make the motions – gently whittle the cord down into a smaller size. Perhaps you just narrow it down to a standard vinyl rope. Maybe you feel that you need to wear it down to just the faintest thread. It’s up to you.

If you are cutting the cord, repeat the same process, but visualize the severing of the cord. Immediately after the cord is cut, heal yourself in that location. Place your hands there and send your breath, healing light, or ask those who you called into protect you to help you heal. See the wound being repaired and healed completely, and perhaps visualize something sweet in that spot, like your favorite flower or a symbol of peace.

Sit for a few moments in this space and check in with yourself.

7. Thank your guides or loved ones or whoever you called in for their time and protection. Close up your sacred space. It’s done.

How to Avoid Creating Unconscious Cords

If you’re anything like me, you probably want to have a say on who you’re making attachments with or how you approach someone with whom you don’t have the best cord. There are ways you can shield yourself to keep your own inner peace and energy – you don’t have to let them in. You’re allowed to have a say. You just need to be objective about it. Too many times we allow our emotions to cloud our judgment and we’re unable to see what we can learn and instead just close ourselves off. So, be aware.

To shield yourself, you can:

  • Limit the amount of time you spend with the drains in your life.
  • Wear protective stones on your body, either as necklaces, rings, bracelets, or just stones in your bra. Shungite, aegirine, and black tourmaline are the ones I use most often.
  • Put up an energetic shield by:
    • Imagining a big egg (or crystal or box or whatever you wish) of glowing bright light that goes out 12” around the perimeter of your body.
    • If you want stronger protection, you can also imagine the whole outside of your shield covered in mirrors, like a disco ball, facing outward, which reflects their energy back to them. It also prevents any penetration of energy into the shield.
  • Place your hands on your solar plexus (right above your belly button), creating a direct shield over the place where most people generally tend to cord. If this is an already established cord, placing your hands here can create a temporary ‘kink’ in the cord, preventing it from being active and preventing them from sending any new energy in.
  • Check in with yourself often to assess your own energy levels. Get to know your body’s signals when you begin to feel drained. You may yawn, feel muscle weakness, get a headache, feel tension, or just feel like you’re ready to be finished. Honor and respect your body, and if you can no longer shield, leave the encounter.
  • If you get anxious at night before sleeping by overthinking or worrying, place your hands over your solar plexus again so you can stop the influx of energies from different situations and people from the day. It should relax you enough to sleep.

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